What Happens If Your Spouse Doesn’t Want a Divorce?~ 3 min read
If your spouse does not want a divorce, they can slow the divorce process by refusing to cooperate, but they cannot prevent the divorce from happening. In Missouri, one spouse does not need the other’s agreement to end the marriage. Collaborative Divorce and Mediation can help both you and your spouse communicate, address concerns, and better understand the issues that are making the divorce difficult to accept.
Your Spouse Cannot Stop the Divorce
One of the most common questions people have is whether their spouse can prevent a divorce simply by refusing to agree to it. In Missouri, the answer is no. If you no longer want to remain married, the court will ultimately grant the divorce.
A spouse who opposes the divorce can delay the process by not providing documents or refusing to participate. While that may slow things down, it does not stop the case from moving forward forever. Eventually, the court will hold hearings and make decisions regarding property division, child custody, and other outstanding issues.
Why Some Spouses Resist Divorce
When a spouse says they do not want a divorce, there is usually more behind that statement than a simple refusal. In some situations, they are struggling with uncertainty about what their life will look like after the marriage ends.
They may worry about finances, parenting arrangements, or where they will live. Sometimes the fear of the unknown creates resistance because they have not had the opportunity to fully understand what is involved in the divorce process.
How Collaborative Divorce and Mediation Help
Collaborative Divorce and Mediation provide an opportunity to discuss concerns that may be preventing your spouse from accepting the divorce. Sometimes those concerns involve finances, parenting arrangements, or uncertainty about life after the marriage ends. In some situations, you can discuss alternatives, such as a legal separation, before making final decisions.
Many people who initially oppose the divorce are not necessarily trying to create conflict. They are struggling with fear of the unknown. They may not understand how your property will be divided, what the parenting arrangements will look like, or how they will manage financially after the divorce.
Through meetings with a mediator or a Collaborative Divorce team, you and your spouse can ask questions, gather information, and gain a clearer understanding of the divorce process. As concerns are addressed and communication improves, the spouse who does not want the divorce may become more comfortable with what lies ahead and better able to participate in resolving important issues.
Finding Closure Through Communication
When communication improves, the spouse who opposes the divorce may have a better understanding of why your marriage is ending, which can provide the closure they need to begin accepting the change and making informed decisions about the future.
In rare situations, improved communication has even led couples to reconcile. More commonly, it helps you and your spouse to better understand one another’s perspectives and reach a greater level of understanding about the path ahead.
Contact Family Ally
At Family Ally, we help families resolve divorce issues through Collaborative Divorce and Mediation. If you are facing a divorce and want to make informed decisions in a respectful and constructive environment, contact Jennifer Piper at 314-449-9800 or contact us online to schedule a consultation.
Family Ally is located at 130 S. Bemiston Ave., Suite 608, St. Louis, MO 63105.
FAQs
1. Can my spouse refuse to sign divorce papers and stop the divorce?
No. While your spouse may slow the process by refusing to cooperate, Missouri courts will still move the case forward and grant the divorce.
2. What if my spouse is afraid of losing time with the children?
Some spouses resist divorce because they are worried about parenting arrangements. Collaborative Divorce and Mediation provide opportunities to discuss those concerns and create parenting plans that work for the family. They also allow parents to better understand their parenting time after the divorce.
3. Will Collaborative Divorce help if my spouse does not want the divorce?
Yes. Collaborative Divorce provides a structured setting where your spouse can discuss concerns, ask questions, and gain a better understanding of the financial, parenting, and practical issues involved in the divorce process.
Jennifer R. Piper is a family law attorney, mediator, and parenting coordinator with more than 20 years of experience serving families in the St. Louis area. She is certified as a Guardian ad Litem and frequently appointed by courts to represent children in high-conflict cases. Jennifer is a former Chair of the Family and Juvenile Law Section of the Bar Association of Metropolitan St. Louis and an active leader in local and state bar organizations.
Her professional recognition includes being named to The Best Lawyers in America® (2017–2025), Missouri Super Lawyers (2021–2024), and receiving a Women’s Justice Award from Missouri Lawyers Weekly. Jennifer also holds an AV Preeminent rating from Martindale-Hubbell. She regularly speaks on family law topics and has helped shape family court procedures through her service on multiple committees.
